1. Company A finds out about a large consulting job
2. Company A puts an ad out for someone to build it
3. Small company B (or a couple freelancers) puts in a proposal to Company A for $x.
4. Company A puts in a proposal for $x + $y
1) You've gotta network the shit out of it if you want the big $$$. Otherwise get ready for assholes on craigslist who are looking for "a college student that wants to build their portfolio"
2) Pricing balls. You need them. It's a huge signaling factor. If you are charging $40/hr it doesn't matter how good you are because you've already communicated you suck. My biz partner heard Obie Fernandez (I think) saying if you develop in Rails you should be charging $175/hr minimum. Arbitrary but it works. As a programmer you have to constantly deal with feelings of inadequacy that will make you want to flinch. Don't worry though, it gets easier with each project.
3) Don't take projects less than $10,000. That means no band websites, no real estate companies, etc. They are a waste of your time. The problem with referrals is that if you charge one person $40 you're not gonna get a referral to drop $175. Stay hungry.
4) Partnerships. Quote projects in the $30k-$250k range. Maybe the client doesn't have that much money, so take $20k and half the equity. Never ever do a partnership unless they have lots of skin ($) in the game.
5) Finding new business. What is the best product or tool you've built already? Find businesses in related industries or ways to apply the technology in other industries. The only way to do this is to read a lot and talk to other people about what their pain points are. Don't write any code. Spend time thinking and talking about the problem domain and then seek people out and pitch them. If you have actually thought through what THEIR problems are it's usually an easy sell.
6) Get ahold of some proposals from some big design firms that you respect. Copy their style.
7) Watch this video from Carlos Segura. He is talking to designers but it's all the same. You have to learn how to communicate like this or biz people will not respect you. You have to proactively define the relationship up front.
http://www.businesspov.com/article/315
8) Have an opinion. If someone has a shitty idea don't you dare code it just because they are paying you. The reason people hire consultants is because they are clueless. If you just do what the tell you then they rightfully will assume that you are clueless too. Fight through it with them and you both come out ahead.
You shouldn't expect to jump into the pool with the big dogs unless you can swim. Good talk is one thing, but if you can't back it up with genuine competency (unless you're working solo) you'll be found out fast and nobody will like you. At all. And you can forget about referrals after that.
I've worked large contract jobs for several years and love it. There are a few of us who follow each other around in my industry and we can spot the fakes pretty quickly. If you can really deliver on the goods--i.e., you're as productive as 5 or 6 average programmers and can communicate effectively--you'll be able to ask for what you want and get it most of the time.
Tell your client your hourly rate. Then slap your client in the face.
If they're not more shocked by the rate than the slap, you're not charging enough.
Also, make some prominent small projects, artsy fartsy or designery or whatever. Something that's exciting and interesting and based off Twitter or feeds or some such buzzwordy BS. That's the best way to rope in marketing agency work... where everyone charges outrageous rates all the time, so they don't mind paying them ;)
There is also a book called Winning Government Contracts by Malcolm Parvey & Deborah Alston. ISBN: 978-1-56414-975-6
It makes it very hard to manage responsibilities when you subcontract with multiple entities at once so a corporation will likely pass you over for that reason alone.