If you want others to see the new thing automatically, you need something much more powerful than plain old assignment anyway: something which will let you pick a synchronization strategy.
"Changes at any arbitrary time, including when you are halfway through reading it" is not in any way a sound synchronization strategy and the only thing you get with assignment.
You seem to understand the important difference between identity (what you see when you read an object) and reference (what you use to access the object). Next important thing on the list is how "reference" cannot just be a pointer to a place in memory -- unless it is immutable.