There is no talent shortage, and if there is, it's of management, not the ability to write code. The difference between a good developer and a code monkey is that the first is self-managing. They have to be, to do their job. But even they can't do it without clear communication about the project---and cash, of course.

That the shortage is of management, not developer talent (if you protest that there is a developer shortage, I have bad news for you about where the shortage of management ability is), means that the interviewer is generally in the power position.

Ergo:

How great can the conversation be on such unequal terms? I'm not saying I haven't had good conversations with interviewers or interviewees, but it can't be expected to be a regular thing. What I really think is a smorgasbord of hunches, folk wisdom, and Alan Kay quotes---but I would never be so rude as to express such in an interview.

Buy the girl a drink first, sheesh.