according to BLS, the median is more like $110k: https://www.bls.gov/ooh/computer-and-information-technology/...

anyway, the median figure doesn't tell you a whole lot by itself. the median rent in the US for is ~$950 for a 1BR or ~$1250 for a 3BR (suitable for a family with 2-3 children). if you make the median salary, you are probably taking home $6000-6500 a month depending on tax situation. having ~$5000 left over after paying rent sounds more than just "comfortable" to me.

of course, we don't know exactly how well local rents are correlated with dev pay. maybe to be more than "comfortable" you need to pay for private school or pay rent in the best school district. but it would be much more useful to calculate the ratio of rent or home price to pay for each dev and then take the median of that.

That's what I see. As the OP I can say that my wages aren't through the roof, and I don't think they ever will be. I'm a developer and under 100K. I'm not sure anyone I know in this industry has a "through the roof" salary. I don't know anyone at Google. Given how hard I work for the money I do make, I'm expecting to unionize or go solo with my own thing, before my salary somehow goes through the roof. Either of those are more likely.