Basic 1 bedroom apartment rent, at least 45min commute or less to Menlo Park/Palo Alto - $4000/mo
CalTrain/BART/car insurance/bus/Uber - $1000/mo (this is conservative, since car insurance costs more in the Bay since the DA won't enforce anti-theft laws)
Groceries - $400/mo
Utilities and phone bill - $400/mo
Health insurance - $300/mo
Miscellaneous other expenses (e.g. soap, toilet paper, etc.) - $500/mo
CA tax bracket for the 57k-295k income range is 9.3%, so your average rate for that 250k is going to be pretty close to 9%. Your effective federal rate under the new tax plan being discussed in Congress right now is going to come in the mid 30's - let's say 32% to be conservative. Social Security adds 6.2%, Medicare another 1.45% under current rates. CA SDI is another 1%. Total effective rate: 49.65%. Post-tax earnings: $125,875 out of $250,000.
What about your expenses? Well, if you do the math, the above comes out to $79,200/year. You now have $46,000/year to save towards a house... which oh by the way, costs $1.5M at present day for a shack in Fremont. Oh, and forget about having kids too.
Yes, you aren't starving, but considering you're making $250k it's kind of egregious that you aren't able to purchase a run-down house in 30 years from your income. The problem is twofold: the state taxes away half your income so you can't build wealth, and NIMBYs opposing the development of new housing suck away the rest of your income.
And before you say we should be focusing on actual poor people first: perhaps consider that the state clearly has the resources for both?