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0 pointsBubble_Pop_223y ago0 comments

> The top 10% of men in the dating pool end up dating 80% of the women

I am sorry but this is BS. Mathematically speaking it's impossible.

It's the emotional component which makes people feel like perennial underdogs and say abominations like the above.

No matter how rich you are you can only bring one girl to a dinner date per night. Even a guy like Dan Bilzerian is on the record saying that a vacation in which he brings more than 8 girls rapidly becomes hell

What is true is that the top 1% of males is desired by 90% of women but that is also true the other way around given that men too have become extremely vulnerable to PR , advertisement and the promotional industry in general. So they deeply desire Kim Kardashian even though the college girl next door is probably conventinally hotter considering age and height.

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fxtentacle3y ago

I believe op was using "dating" as an euphemism for "having sex with".

That means dinner isn't required. Plus if the average unlucky guy has 1 date per 2 weeks, it would be entirely possible for a lucky guy to have 14x more dates. A 14:1 starting ratio leading to a 10:1 success ratio seems plausible to me.

stevage3y ago

Mathematically it works fine if the high value men go on more dates than the average woman. Let's say women go on one date a week, and the hot men go on one date per night. It works out.

commandlinefan3y ago

> you can only bring one girl to a dinner date per night

I don't think he was suggesting that those successful men are dating 8 women concurrently - rather, that the other seven women themselves would rather be single than date anybody in the "bottom" 90%. I've been married for a long time now, but this matched my observations from back when I was dating, and from everything I've heard, things have gotten much, much worse for men since I left the market.

LorenPechtel3y ago

It doesn't even take them preferring to be single.

The basic problem is the dating apps have made the pool so large that they can keep trying to get the top 10% and the well never runs dry. Thus they don't settle for what they can actually get.

Thus you get a lot of men with no dates and a lot of women who get dates with men they aren't good enough to actually hook. In reality both sides lose.

MockObject3y ago

The problem is thinking that all women share the same 90%! Sure, there are celebrities that many women would enjoy a date with, but there's tremendous variance in women's tastes, and most women's mates are fairly unattractive to many other women, for all sorts of reasons.

Cpoll3y ago

> Mathematically speaking it's impossible.

Only if you assume the "dating pool" is 1:1 men/women. If you take the view that it's 10:1 men/women then that conclusion is "obvious."

And at least in the context of Tinder, I have read that the ratio of users leans men.

Bubble_Pop_22OP3y ago

It's always 1:1. Dating implies 1:1 dinner.

Rappers, actors and people who feel the need to bring 5 or 6 girls on a date, that's so rare that doesn't even merit counting. And also it ends up pretty quick.

david383y ago

It doesn't. It hasn't for some years.

Dinner is no longer a requirement. Being exclusive is no longer the assumed default.

Cpoll3y ago

No, I mean the population of the "dating pool." For example, if a "dating pool" consists of 10 men and 1 woman, and the woman enters into a monogamous relationship with one of the men, we can say that "the top 10% of men of this dating pool are dating 100% of the women."

david383y ago

You don't understand the term mathematical.

What emotional component? Who said anything about dinner?

You bring a girl over at 6, then another at 8, then 10.

You have a different girl for every day of the week.

It's well known most girls during a certain period of their life will prefer to have a fraction of a high value guy than all of a low value guy.

Bubble_Pop_22OP3y ago

> You have a different girl for every day of the week.

And that girl has a different guy for every day of the week.

It's like war. You only occupy the territory you control with your line of fire.

Likewise you only occupy the time of the person who is with you. As soon as they are out the door then you don't occupy anything anymore and other people will.

It's not a new concept either. All Playboy bunnies had boyfriends and they devoted their time 85% to their boyfriends and 15% to Hefner.

Hefner got more variety in exchange for less claim on each individual Playboy bunny time.

Melchizedek3y ago

No she doesn’t. She only has that one guy once per week at most.

LorenPechtel3y ago

How is it impossible??

Remember, for most people most days it's no date at all.

j / k navigate · click thread line to collapse

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fxtentacle3y ago

I believe op was using "dating" as an euphemism for "having sex with".

stevage3y ago

Mathematically it works fine if the high value men go on more dates than the average woman. Let's say women go on one date a week, and the hot men go on one date per night. It works out.

commandlinefan3y ago

> you can only bring one girl to a dinner date per night

LorenPechtel3y ago

It doesn't even take them preferring to be single.

The basic problem is the dating apps have made the pool so large that they can keep trying to get the top 10% and the well never runs dry. Thus they don't settle for what they can actually get.

Thus you get a lot of men with no dates and a lot of women who get dates with men they aren't good enough to actually hook. In reality both sides lose.

MockObject3y ago

Cpoll3y ago

> Mathematically speaking it's impossible.

Only if you assume the "dating pool" is 1:1 men/women. If you take the view that it's 10:1 men/women then that conclusion is "obvious."

And at least in the context of Tinder, I have read that the ratio of users leans men.

Bubble_Pop_22OP3y ago

It's always 1:1. Dating implies 1:1 dinner.

Rappers, actors and people who feel the need to bring 5 or 6 girls on a date, that's so rare that doesn't even merit counting. And also it ends up pretty quick.

david383y ago

It doesn't. It hasn't for some years.

Dinner is no longer a requirement. Being exclusive is no longer the assumed default.

Cpoll3y ago

david383y ago

You don't understand the term mathematical.

What emotional component? Who said anything about dinner?

You bring a girl over at 6, then another at 8, then 10.

You have a different girl for every day of the week.

It's well known most girls during a certain period of their life will prefer to have a fraction of a high value guy than all of a low value guy.

Bubble_Pop_22OP3y ago

> You have a different girl for every day of the week.

And that girl has a different guy for every day of the week.

It's like war. You only occupy the territory you control with your line of fire.

Likewise you only occupy the time of the person who is with you. As soon as they are out the door then you don't occupy anything anymore and other people will.

It's not a new concept either. All Playboy bunnies had boyfriends and they devoted their time 85% to their boyfriends and 15% to Hefner.

Hefner got more variety in exchange for less claim on each individual Playboy bunny time.

Melchizedek3y ago

No she doesn’t. She only has that one guy once per week at most.

LorenPechtel3y ago

How is it impossible??

Remember, for most people most days it's no date at all.

j / k navigate · click thread line to collapse