IAPs _can_ share for the family:
https://www.theverge.com/2020/12/4/22154178/apple-family-sha...It's the developer's choice, just like family sharing for the original purchase. This was a good move, since so many apps went from paid to free demo +IAP to unlock. I think a lot of devs who previously allowed family sharing for paid apps have turned family sharing on for IAP.