Like other world cuisines, most Americans are exposed to a narrow range of Indian food: mainly a smattering of North Indian dishes and Indian-inspired dishes adapted by the British. Colonial domination of India still casts a pall over world affairs, it seems.
I'm a Spaniard, and what I've noticed is that many people in the U.S. have a limited understanding of what food in Southern Europe is genuinely like. They often overlook how it excels in areas that matter to them: health benefits (thanks to the Mediterranean diet), quality of produce (including vegetables, cheese, meats, fish, fruits, and nuts), and cooking techniques that result in unique and varied flavor profiles.
In Southern Europe, food is about enriching your life, not merely impressing your palate. People's lives often revolve around food, and they are discerning critics. Not only have they tasted a wide variety of dishes, but they've also cooked many of them at home. They're constantly sharing tips about which restaurants to try, which markets to shop at, which Spanish chefs to follow, and even which places to visit primarily for the food. Social circles frequently gather on weekends in restaurants, bars, or homes where food is considered another guest at the table. They critique dishes, challenge each other to improve, and often decide to cook themselves, confident they can do it better. As a general rule, the culinary skills found in an average Spanish home surpass what you'd typically find in an average American restaurant.
It's also a mistake to speak of French and Spanish food as if they're a monolithic culinary style. Both Spain and France, often cited as the powerhouses of modern cuisine (for an authoritative source, check "Modernist Cuisine" by Nathan Myhrvold), boast multiple, diverse, and rich regional cuisines. These regional cuisines are as different from each other as the various regional foods in India. While there are common elements—like the use of olive oil, a focus on seasonal ingredients, a philosophy of highlighting the essence of each dish, and similar proportions of carbs, fats, and proteins—each region has its unique flavors and dishes.
So why do Americans have such a skewed perception of life and food in Southern Europe? One significant factor is the lack of immigration from Spain and France, except for Italians who have had a too much of a strong influence on American perceptions of their cuisine. Cultural and economic factors likely contribute to this. Spaniards and French people value their family and quality of life highly, making them less inclined to move to a country where they might earn more but live less comfortably. This is particularly true for Spaniards, many of whom return to Spain if they do emigrate for professional or survival reasons.
This lack of immigration also explains the scarcity of authentic Spanish restaurants in the U.S. There are only a few, and most that do exist are of subpar quality. Even in places with a higher concentration of immigrants and focus on fine dining, like Miami or Chicago, the quality often falls short. Another issue is the difficulty in finding skilled cooks in the U.S. who can handle the complexities of Mediterranean dishes. Many lack the necessary training (as they are often immigrants, at least in Florida/California), and those who are trained are often accustomed to a different style of cuisine. They haven't developed a palate and understanding of the cuisine. This is not an invention of mine; I've recently talked to a Spanish chef opening a restaurant in Chicago who had to change his whole menu because his staff would be unable to learn how to properly cook it.
The same issues largely apply to French cuisine in the U.S., which brings me to your point that French cuisine focuses on impressing the customer. Traditionally, French cuisine has always been associated with fine dining, and especially so in the U.S. I've always found this to be a parody; Americans are often bewitched by French culture and elitism, it's a self-reinforced belief.
Spanish and French high-end restaurants in America often feature Spanish and French dishes, but they focus more on impressing diners with innovation and surprise than on authenticity, often at the cost of flavor. Running such a restaurant in the U.S. is expensive, often requiring chefs to be brought in from Spain or France, which in turn requires a focus on "impressive" menus to justify the costs, and especially to convince chefs to immigrate to the U.S. There's also a demand for such restaurants, as Americans want to buy in into the luxury of dining at "great" places, and they want to attract business gatherings. Ultimately, any food connoisseur will tell you these restaurants are mediocre. They are focused on making you feel special, not in feeding you stellar food, and they are to be avoided.
The interesting paradox is that if you look at the the most awarded restaurants in the world, most of them outside the US, you'll find the top lists to be dominated by Spanish, French, or at the very least Mediterranean-inspired or Mediterreanean-instructed chefs (like René Redzepi from Noma in Norway, trained at El Bulli). Fine-dining experiences in Europe are significantly different than in the US.
I don't want to argue about which cuisine is the best; I appreciate great frood from anywhere in the world, and personally I truly enjoy the food from Japan, Peru, and China. However, I find that your views on Spanish food seem not only highly biased but also reflective of a broader American perspective that I consider flawed and self-centered.
I encourage you to visit different regions of Spain to experience the food as locals do - you'll need at least three weeks to truly enjoy and experience it. If you need recommendations, let me know and I'll happily share my personal list. And, if you're ever in the Bay Area, I'd be more than happy to share authentic Catalan and Valencian dishes with you, including a true paella.
Ultimately, take my word for it. The Spanish food you can find in the US is a caricature of what it truly is. It somehow pains me how inadequate the American perception of Spanish food is, given the merits it actually has.
