Alright I'll admit when I'm hilariously out of my league.
The point of the post was mostly "people are state machines too" and arguing we don't even know what we are, how will we evaluate AI? Google was giving me actual results every time I searched, and my pattern-matching-happy brain went along with it :D
I spent a few hours trying to build a quantum markov chain. Working theory was that directing the phase when words appear in the same sentence meant interference would cancel out different meanings of a word.
Then I loaded a Dr Seuss book and `cirq` tried to allocate 64 Petabytes. It doesn't even matter at that point.