But I have experience having gone through extremely difficult things with my wife; both of our dads were diagnosed with cancer this year, months apart. Our relationship started only a year before a pandemic. I went through a serious depressive phase. She was diagnosed with and has been (successfully) working through dealing with her C(omplex)-PTSD. I discovered I had ADHD, and have had it since I was a kid, and have gone through that self-discovery process.

Basically, you’re completely correct, but we’ve also discussed the fact that most partners do forget about one another when kids enter the picture, and we have promised not to; and to check in with each other constantly, as the risk of postpartum runs in her family (if that’s even a thing, and it isn’t just people in general).

It may help that she has been through many, many years of therapy on her own, and is also studying to get her masters in psychology to become an LPCC/LMFT.

She’s the strongest and most impressive person I’ve ever met. And I’ve met a lot of strong and impressive people.

So while the chance we end up hating each other isn’t zero, I’m pretty sure it’s as damn low as it can be, and I’m pretty fine with that as life decisions go. :)