> Among mainstream users, people just don't care and this isn't remotely the differentiator people seem to hold it as.

I agree that most users don't consciously care, but I think its definitely possible that it influences how fast the phone feels and could influence purchases if you are testing them side-by-side in a store. There is some anecdotal evidence to that in the fact that Google does the extremely scummy thing of locking their non-pro Pixels to 60Hz when in demo mode regardless of the refresh rate setting chosen in the OS.

why? most videos are 30fps anyway. it's not like they're rendering 30fps videos at 120hz.

I had an iPhone 13 Pro before downgrading to the 13 Mini. One of the reasons I bought the Pro was for the higher refresh screen, and while it's obviously noticeable when using it, it's not something I've ever missed even once.

Yeah, at this market tier 60Hz is a perfectly usable target.