You can attain what you desire by using an RDBMS, and having all tables with one key column, and a TEXT column with your serialized non-key fields; it's going to be a fun approximation of 6NF. Realistically, you can have all joinable columns as normal columns, indexed as you desire, and the rest of the columns as a serialized blob.
When you want high parallelism for guaranteed independent segments of data, use sharding.