Email is simple. It's just text, there's no weird javascript or html or lag. I don't have to open X11. I can just open mutt and read or write. I can type "git send-email". It's all open source, so I can read the code to understand it, and write scripting around it. It runs on any computer with ease. Even on a slow connection, it's quite speedy.
I totally agree with you about Phabricator though.
I have some unconventional workflows. And I try not to bother anyone else with it, especially in a volunteer driven open source context. It would be selfish to do otherwise.
To be honest based on what you've written here, keeping you out of my projects sounds like a good thing. What a bunch of piss and vinegar over how other people are choosing to work in a way that works for them.
You can do nearly everything the website does entirely in the terminal.