Satisfaction is the North Star. Difficult things don’t bring happiness but doing them well brings satisfaction. Climbing a mountain, completing a hard bike ride. Finishing a project.
In this way the optimal path through a difficult situation brings satisfaction making the whole experience worthwhile.
Satisfaction is lasting, deep and meaningful. It grants meaning even to suffering and unhappiness.
Being sore doesn’t bring happiness, but it’s a reminder of work done well. Unpleasant circumstances don’t bring happiness, but handling them well creates that other emotion.
Building something is satisfying, loving and being dependable are satisfying, being professional and doing good work… You get the idea.
You can keep your happiness. I’m taking the next level.
I find happiness to be "the art of expectation setting", and the "art of reframe".
Mindfulness meditation and introspection help a lot.
But, becoming "good" at this skill comes with a particular loss, of which I have some wistful feelings for.
Life no longer feels like it is happening to me. I do not experience large swings of emotion, great loss, unexpected turns, high highs, low lows. Music doesn't hit like it once did.
I have traded the turbulence of life for predictable, stable growth. It is less exciting, and I have mourned the loss of my previous way of seeing, but I am much happier now.
That’s also a skill or you can call it a perspective, which can be acquired!
