Tell HN: Properly using dishwasher reduced friction with my wife

Here's an idea:

Don't keep score. If you're there and there's dishes, rinse them and put them in the dishwasher. It'll take a few minutes and your partner will be grateful.

If you insist on keeping score, aim for something like 80% of the time.

Last fall I stopped trying to optimize loading the dishwasher and waiting to run it until it was full. I call it "dishwasher anarchy".

Now it gets loaded haphazardly throughout the day, run at night, and emptied the next morning.

It really, really offends my sensibilities. Stuff is in the "wrong" place. We are using a lot more detergent. I assume we are using a lot more energy and water.

I haven't had any dishwasher-related fights with my wife and daughter since we started this new protocol. I guess that's a win.

There's 3 parts to that problem, every part is critical to get right. Yes, all 3 are critical for the operation. If you're loading it wrong, you are doing it wrong, etc.

Loading up. If you're not loading it up, the rest of the loop is useless. If you're loading it incorrectly, the arm doesn't spin and you are better off not having a machine doing it. Also, consistently loading it optimally is of course best. Throwing everything in the box and hoping it gets sorted before running is the worst way to approach the job. You don't start playing Tetris on line 14, you start on line 0.

Running optimally. Running it when 100% full is not the ideal option. You are best off running on a schedule that best allows time for the next step. Usually overnight and middle of the day are good but it entirely depends on when you expect to have free time for the last step.

Unloading. Just do it. Do it before picking up anything else. It comes before everyone gets to bother you with anything. You can't eat until everything is back where it should be. And you need to eat.

Dishwasher related video from "Technology Connections": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DAX2_mPr9W8

I just do everything i can around the house immediately (as long as I dont have to go to work or whatever).. if its a long job it gives me the opportunity to listen to a podcast. “industry is its own reward”.

I’ve always been a straight into the dishwasher person, unless it was already clean and I was too lazy to unload it. Going to the sink first is extra work.

My dishwashing creed also. How I do wish I could convince others to stop doing dishes like it’s 1985, and let the machine do the work efficiently

In our house it used to be the same thing every day: dishes pile up in the sink, someone says “I’ll do it later,” and then it slowly turns into stress.What fixed it was super simple. We just put dirty dishes straight into the dishwasher as we use them. At night we run it. In the morning we empty it completely so it’s ready again. Since doing that, the kitchen stays clean, nobody argues about whose turn it is, and it doesn’t feel like one person is always stuck doing the cleanup.

Huh. I would never have thought of "pile up dirty crockery until some later time" as an option!