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0 pointsdelichon2h ago0 comments

A large part of the protectiveness of children is about the fertility trend. Parents with four children think about safety very differently than parents with probably ever only one. I saw this on my home street growing up. The girl next door was an only child who her parents hovered over relentlessly. When I was ten, with three brothers, and told mom I was going exploring, she made sure I had a quarter to phone home if my bike got a flat and told me to have fun.

We joke about having a main child and an emergency backup child, but deep down it's not a joke, it changes our behavior.

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andai2h ago

Yeah, as an only child it's a weird burden to be the guy who makes or breaks the whole bloodline. No pressure right ;)

But that pressure is on the parents too. There's this weird two-way feedback loop.

Single child household has made parenting culture neurotic. Because if you screw it up it ends your entire bloodline.

But the neurotic attitude makes child rearing feel like such a burden, people can hardly imagine doing it more than once...

I am told this attitude does not produce beneficial outcomes in the children either. Apparently people grow up healthier when their parents are relaxed.

boelboel1h ago

I'm not sure if single child households have done this to parenting culture as much as neurotic culture/economic incentives have pushed single child households. When everyone is competing it makes sense to focus on one child as you don't want your child to be at a disadvantage vs those who can spend on tutors/extra curriculars/.... It's a problem in Italy and some eastern countries, a bad and anti-social evolution in my opinion but I doubt it's going to change.

m3kw92h ago

people still think about bloodline when having kids or when caring about safety? I would think that would be the last thing to worry about with kids safety.

JV002h ago

They are wired by biology to think like that, consciously or not

XorNot2h ago

This feels like assigning intent where economics is more correct: your priority is your children, but if you have three then by necessity you didn't multiply your attention or time in proportion.

Even going from one child to two.. suddenly you don't have numbers on your side in dealing with things.

Fraterkes1h ago

Which parts are not a joke? If someone asked you who your main child was you’d be able to answer?

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