> And with Facebook I'm always unclear about who can see what (private, friends, Facebook users, everyone?)
it seems cruel to say this is your fault - Facebook's UI for determining this is terrible and basically only .05% of Facebooks users have an idea of where their messages go (probably).
Perhaps part of the age gap is that you actually care to think about where the messages go while a younger audience just assumes it is handled the way it should be, or cares little about controlling it.