I used to run Subsonic, now I'm loving http://plexapp.com and the (paid) iOS app.
I'm also an Rdio and Netflix subscriber, but running Plex on my server allows me to 'roll my own Netflix' and stream movies and music to my iPad or other computers, or even from my server to any computer in the web browser. I'm happy.
Man, I can't get Plex to run. It looks so excellent but whenever I try and play anything I get "Media player error! Resetting" and then nothing happens.
Edit: Rebooted phone and it works now. Holy shit this is cool, and I can even share my media library with friends!
Plex is the only solution that I have found that seamlessly plays video on my flatscreen through my mobile with the content being served from my laptop.
Before you ask - yes I used to be running xbmc, minidlna, etc. previously. No, they are nowhere as good (actually, to rephrase, the client-server model is not xbmc's focus, which is completely wrong IMHO).
So you can set up apache to host movies on a home network, then stream them with VLC? That sounds like a fantastic solution. Is there a solution for playing music this way on something resembling a stereo that supports playlists?