Ask HN: Keeping sane while working remotely

I freelanced for several years and was in a similar situation. Then, my GF and I bought a house outside town on a couple of acres. I'd see friends once and awhile and of course had the internet, but it became extremely lonely (which is saying a lot as I'm a bit of a loner in the first place). My already suspect social skills were getting even worse. Sometimes I felt like I was going a bit nuts.

I finally got a job. It was great... there were people all around, politics, jokes, boring stories... it was somewhere I really looked forward to going. My GF was much happier as well. I was generally bathed, shaved and a whole lot more social. But I wasn't doing the same level of work, nor was I learning as much, nor was I making the money I could have. So.. I'm getting ready to leave and go back to work solo again. This time I leased an office in a high rise with a bunch of neighboring businesses in the downtown of the small town I live near. We will see what happens this time, but I predict having people around and a schedule will fix the problems that arose last time.

I feel for you. It's great at first not to go to a workplace but there are things one really starts missing and after a long period of time it becomes quite isolating.

The first thing I would do is get a dog =)

Besides that - download some audio books and go for a walk if weather is nice. Or just walk around and think, that's awesome.

Join some clubs related to your hobbies. Try Toastmasters or Improv or Stand Up, or play Go.

Gym, running, exercise. Biking.

Go outside and pick up girls. Write a book or blog in your free time.

Or if you are in a big city - find a hackerspace nearby.

Check out yoga studios nearby. Because it's class based, it's more directed and time sensitive than working out, and a lot of them also foster community, so it might be easier for you to strike up a few conversations than at a gym.

Give a few of them a try to find the one that's right for you.

Ignore co-worker spaces. If you feel lonely, go work from a public library or a coffee-shop. It's free (minus the coffee), and you can pick most convenient one.

Get a room-mate. Sharing an apartment with other people will give you at least a bare minimum of socializing and something to exchange a quick chat once or twice a day. Plus it saves money.

Keep social routine - meet with other people for diner, sports, chat, movie. Keep track when was the last time you meet with other people. Keep in mind the people enjoy being asked-out. Be casual, don't be pushy and let them decline without guilt, and they will be happy that there is someone that shows interest in hanging out with them, even if they are declining most of the time. Most people gets lonely, yet lacks courage and motivation to actively seek companionship. Going for a short walk or doing groceries together can be nice too. And you can be open about the fact that you're seeking companionship more activey, as you're working remotely.

Socialize on other events: conferences, user groups, etc. This is also professionally important. If you work in the office, you will get to know people that might like you and get you a job in the future. If you're working remotely you're risking being left out.

Radio in the background with some interesting talks can feel like hanging around people.

Gym is always good. Especially if you're working remotely. It gives you some schedule, motivation and happy feeling.

Work from coffee shops and just people watch when you take a break from your work. I find working from somewhere else to both be mentally stimulating and relaxing.

Nobody has suggested this yet, but a co-working space is a great option.

If your company doesn't already have servers you can work from (ie. a VPN), then just buy yourself a $5 dollar server and run OpenVPN on it (and then work from the co-working space).

Also, never work alone and rather sit amongst the other workers. Talk and chat like you would in an office.

On the days when you need quiet and focus, you work from home.

Good luck.

I use to feel the exact same when I started working as a freelancer. i'd see friends once in a while but unless I decided to go out, I wouldn't more than one actual conversation a week.

Then a friend introduced me to bouldering, which islike rope climbing, but on much smaller walls, without ropes, and huge mats on the floor. I've always like sports, so I was hooked, but after 2 years now, what makes me stay is the people I've met there. I can go and exercise, get out of there completely crushed and happy, but I'll also meet people, some stronger than me who'll happily give me advices, help me, some just starting to whom I'll give an advice here and there, and after that we all have a beer, talk about our common passion for climbing, discover we have more in common and nowadays, more than half of my friends are climbers, and it's really great, we plan weekends out climbing, watch the competitions together and always have a great time.

Another nice thing is that most climbing gyms have a restaurant, wifi, when I just have to be on my computer but don't have much work to do, I just go there, plug my computer, work for a few minutes, go climbing, come back to check my emails, nobody cares, I have a great time.

So yeah, if you like sports, don't want to just lift dumbells (which I tried to do but got too booring to me) then climbing might be something great to do for your body and a place to meet really nice people. I'd just avoid rope climbing as it often requires a partner (unless you don't care bout the rope but I doubt it) and the feedback loop isn't as short (completing a 30m routes is more difficult than a 5m boulder in just one session).

The co-working space is a nice idea, though it can be quite expensive, that why I didn't do it. Cooking lunch for friends working near where you live might offer you a real break and an easy opportunity for you to see your friends too. Plenty of things you can do actually !

The way my company is run, we got quite a few people working from home or actually from wherever they like to be. I do miss being in an office sometimes, but the productivity increase from working from home is huge. Also it allows us to find and retain the best talent, wherever they are. We use Slack to communicate with each other and also have scheduled Google Hangout Video calls every day with a few team members. Doing Hangouts and also running some non work related / banter channels on Slack makes up for a lot of missed watercooler conversation in the office. The video calls also force you to dress nicely, shave and get yourself into work mode every day :).

Join a co-working space, work from cafes (can be hard too) or rent an office with friends. Why? Keeping the work at work and enjoying the time at home will be a good strategy against burning out. Of course it will take you some time to commute or be more expensive than just staying at home, but it's a good way to stay sane. Maybe you can also create your own office in 1 room and be at home in the other rooms. But you might be tempted to work longer than what is healthy.

From a work perspective:

http://www.hanselman.com/blog/30TipsForSuccessfulCommunicati...

Listen to talk radio and do something to get out of the house during the day (each lunch out, buy coffee, gym, etc). Also, find a significant other.

co-working.. duh.

take weekends off.

Dress for work, as if you're going into the office - that is, don't work in your bathrobe.

When the remote office is closed, don't hang out online, not even HN.